Through many trials and tribulations people always say, “You will always have your family there to back you up.” Well, what about those times they are not there for you? What about those moments when you need someone to understand you and someone in your family does not give you the time of day?

I know that after my mom passed away my family never felt the same again. Some people went in their own directions of life and others stayed close. Choosing good friends is vital to having a “first” or “second” or even a “third” family around you. Realize that your friends can be your family too. Family doesn’t just mean humans who are related to you by blood. Family means love, respect, and honesty.

Families can be made up of others who want the best for you, who want to see you grow, who challenge you to make you a better person.

Everyone (hopefully) has a couple of good friends they love to be around. Don’t shut out the idea of friends becoming your family. It’s important to have a close relationship with people you love and care about. These people become your family. We have the luxury of choosing our friends so pick wisely. These are the people that will be with you for the rest of your life. You can have that one friend who you see as a sibling and share your deepest darkest secrets with. It can even be a significant other. Honestly, it can even be your dog. Having people around you who understand and appreciate who you are is the meaning of family. Yes, families fight all the time, but there are the moments you cherish in your celebrations.

You don’t have to be stuck with the typical nuclear family that you do or do not have. I am not saying that you should go runaway from home. I mean that you should understand that every person around you can be a part of your family- a part of your world.

I have many close friends that I see as part of my family. These people know the “ins” and “outs” of almost everything going on in my life. Sharing my private life helps me feel closer with my friends and makes them feel more like family. My friendships also feel more genuine. I grew up with everyone telling me, “Don’t tell anyone anything about your personal life because you want everyone to think your life is great!” Ugh, Pleeeeease!!! When was the last time you met someone who had their entire life put together? (instagram profiles do not count).

Maintaining close friendships require you to stop pushing others away and start keeping the good ones around. Your friends should want the best for you and if they don’t you need to find yourself some new ones because you deserve better than that.